Tuesday, January 26, 2010

why can't all puns be food puns?

The following is a Facebook status posted by a friend last week. It was followed by a series of comments, mostly from two mutual friends of ours, that were not only hilarious, but inspiring. I fancy myself a punny person, but I know when I'm out of my league. I hope you enjoy these as much as I clearly do.

Christina Coady ate her weight in raw fish. amazing.

January 19 at 8:08pm · ·
Sean Conforti
Sean Conforti
You are what you eat, fish-girl.
January 19 at 8:32pm
Christina Coady
Christina Coady
Good thing I'm just a small fry...
January 19 at 8:52pm
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
That was very shellfish of you.
January 19 at 9:29pm
Sean Conforti
Sean Conforti
*drum roll*
January 19 at 9:49pm
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. I must be hard of herring.
January 19 at 10:03pm
Sean Conforti
Sean Conforti
Ohhh shit this guy is on fire!
January 19 at 10:04pm
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
There's no need to carp. You could say I'm a sole man.
January 19 at 10:38pm
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
And watch out eating all that fish, Chris; you may think it's salmon chanted evening, but you could end up feeling pretty eel. You might even have to see a sturgeon.
January 19 at 10:43pm
Sean Conforti
Sean Conforti
Don't stop Nathan! Keep going!!!
January 19 at 11:34pm
Danielle Dolgoy
Danielle Dolgoy
amazing! blogworthy! may i steal? i promise to give credit...
January 19 at 11:39pm ·
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
If you like, though it's not that amazing, really, once you know the names of fish. Once you get a grouper them together, you can perch them any plaice you like.
January 19 at 11:49pm
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
I don't have any special talent, really. Think of it as a gift from Cod.
January 19 at 11:49pm
Danielle Dolgoy
Danielle Dolgoy
eeeehehehe. so good. talk punny to me, Nathan!
January 19 at 11:52pm ·
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
You don't have to be koi to do this. When the opportunity shoals itself, you snapper up.
January 19 at 11:59pm
Danielle Dolgoy
Danielle Dolgoy
eeeheehee!
January 20 at 12:01am ·
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
But if I couldn't think of fish names quickly, I would've haddock ruffe time of it.
January 20 at 12:06am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
It gets harder and harder to kipper going after you do several in a roe. You have to mullet over.
January 20 at 12:07am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
But you can always rely on some trout and true fish puns to pull you through, as long as you're in tuna with your audience.
January 20 at 12:11am
Danielle Dolgoy
Danielle Dolgoy
stop, you're giving me a stitch in my side...
January 20 at 12:11am ·
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
And fish provide the bass material for this kind of thing. You don't seahorses providing anything like these goldfish puns.
January 20 at 12:14am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
Ask them and they just clam up. It's enough to make you say "Ahi-vey"!
January 20 at 12:16am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
Trouble is, after a while you run out of fish names. You begin roaching farther and farther. The silence gets longer and you have to fillet. One moment you're Marlin Brando, the next you're just another sucker.
January 20 at 12:22am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
So you have to scampi off before you krill the joke with too many puns.
January 20 at 12:24am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
Don't char your reputation with too many turbot-charged fish puns.
January 20 at 12:27am
Sean Conforti
Sean Conforti
I climaxed when you said "Marlin Brando".
January 20 at 12:28am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
That's a load of pollacks and you know it.
January 20 at 12:33am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
If I'm going to seabed anytime soon, I have to pike up the pace.
January 20 at 12:33am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
Just a few more, then I have to sashimi off to sleep.
January 20 at 12:36am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
What's the favourite song of every fish pun artiste?

"When the moon hits your eye, like a big pizza pie...that's a moray."
January 20 at 12:39am
Sean Conforti
Sean Conforti
Man, Newlands would be loving this.
January 20 at 12:39am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
Before I go I'd like to say sorry to Christina for the mess we've made of her status update. We owe her at least a minnow-mal apology for all this.
January 20 at 12:43am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
And finally...

You might be asking one shrimple question after all this: Why?
January 20 at 12:44am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
Why?

Just for the halibut.
January 20 at 12:45am
Nathan Coles
Nathan Coles
Goodnight, everybody!
January 20 at 12:45am
Tish Coady
Tish Coady
Vert entertaining. That Christina is what a higher education is all about. And dad reminds you thatyour friends are well "schooled"
January 20 at 4:53am
Christina Coady
Christina Coady
hahaha... Ma, that's our fancy education at work.
January 20 at 8:02am

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